Monday, November 2, 2015

HEY HAROLD, GOING "ON MISSION"??? - LIAR



(Apuron and Harold's trip to Columbia)

This is where the money goes: Apuron's raunchy excursions with his playboy pets.

38 comments:

  1. It's only three weeks.

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    Replies
    1. Note who the other passenger is. This is no mission. He's going as Tony's playmate. Well, that's quite a mission.

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    2. I thought the archbishop was accompanying newly ordained Pedro to Columbia after the Nov. 7 ordination as he does after each ordination.

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    3. Yes Pedro will be going along with who knows who else. But Harold has the special distinction of being Tony's private toy - er - I mean guest.

      They will never tell but probably we are paying for 4-5 presbyters to all go to Colombia. But only one will stay with tony in San Fran for the holidays.

      Oooooh. Fr OJ must be sooooooo jealous!
      Nice drama unfolding.

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    4. Harold Body Guard for weak 70 year old bald guy carrying cash. Medellin very dangerous city. Harold knows the ropes.

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    5. OJ and Harold take turns. People were on to the three musketeers. Big time .

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    6. Bald guy that reeks of men's perfume, okay? Get the description correct. Details are important!

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    7. Harold,
      What sign is that you are flashing? Is that the medellín cartel gang sign for "esta la vista baby" ? - So un priestly like.. What a clown..

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  2. To those who actually did pay $200 a plate...doesn't this nauseate you? Better believe the protesting will NOT end!

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  3. Fr. Matthew Blockley.November 2, 2015 at 12:57 PM


    Disgusting to say the least . This is where the money goes. disgusting.

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  4. Fly on the wall reporting from the bishop’s house in San Ramon Hill:
    First the players:
    AAA=Archbishop Apuron
    FHC=Presbyter Harold Colorado
    SAD=Sonny Ada
    TPA=Travel Agency
    FAT=Fr Adrian Terrible
    The setting:
    Several phone calls recently heard from the holy house of Archbishop of Guam

    AAA: Hello Harold, this is Tony. How is the mission going?
    FHC: Very good Brother Tony. The brothers here are taking very good care of me. I didn’t realize how many excellent restaurants and discos there are here. You really know this town!
    AAA: Yes, I own several homes there and used to go often when my brother Ben was still there. Very few people know this, but even the house you’re staying at is mine. Remember what I told you Harold about being under the radar, ok?
    FHC: Yes, Tony. No worries. I only wear my collar during the day, and never at the clubs or the casinos. But everybody seems to know your posse, so they are asking if I am a priest, or just a friend of yours. I just tell them I am a special friend, and they seem to know what that means, so they treat me to anything I want. I really appreciate all the things you have done for me. I really needed this break after having been a priest already for two years. Keeping all the boys in Yona out of trouble can really exhaust a person.
    AAA: Ok. Just remember you owe me. By the way, my cousin gave you an envelop, right?
    FHC: Yes, he actually gave me 8 envelopes.
    AAA: Yay. Make sure to bring those with you, but keep them in the safe for now. The combination is 11-1-45, can you remember that?
    FHC: That’s your birthday! How was the big party.
    AAA: It was fantastic. So many people love me. They brought me so many envelopes. I actually wore two rings so more people could show their love by kissing the rings.
    FHC: You are so thoughtful Tony. I did as you instructed me, and I made sure to sell my quota of 4 tables, or 40 tickets. That’s $8,000 which should be enough for our tickets and expenses for our big trip coming up. But some of the people were kind of upset when I told them they had to buy some.
    AAA: Did you tell them what Pius had instructed to all the presbyters?
    FHC: Yes, they had to be obedient, and it worked. Did Pedro’s family buy two tables?
    AAA: Yes, they are poor people but they borrowed from a community back home. They were told not to question, as this is how we can afford to send him home to celebrate his fist mass in Colombia. There will be a scrutiny down there soon, so their community will be able to use some of those funds for the loan, and so his presbyter in Colombia can come to Guam for his ordination. God provides!
    FHC: Amen to that! Are our tickets all taken care of?

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  5. Fly on the wall reporting from the bishop’s house in San Ramon Hill:
    First the players:
    AAA=Archbishop Apuron
    FHC=Presbyter Harold Colorado
    SAD=Sonny Ada
    TPA=Travel Agency
    FAT=Fr Adrian Terrible
    The setting:
    Several phone calls recently heard from the holy house of Archbishop of Guam

    first call continued...
    AAA: Yes, they are poor people but they borrowed from a community back home. They were told not to question, as this is how we can afford to send him home to celebrate his fist mass in Colombia. There will be a scrutiny down there soon, so their community will be able to use some of those funds for the loan, and so his presbyter in Colombia can come to Guam for his ordination. God provides!
    FHC: Amen to that! Are our tickets all taken care of?
    AAA: Yes, with some of the sales we had, I siphoned some of your table money out to pay for the airfare.
    FHC: First class?
    AAA: No! I told you, we can only buy coach so even if they find out they won’t blast me about being extravagant. But I’ve got more than 5 million miles so I’ll get us upgraded next week. But, we’ll still be able to sit together the whole way. We leave here on 11/10 and we’ll spend 11 days in Medellin, and then we’ll spend a week in San Francisco with John Quitugua for Thanksgiving. They only have one spare room, so we’ll have to share, if that’s ok with you?
    FHC: Sure, it’ll be fun, just like our trip to the Holy land earlier this year. By the way, Tony, I’m telling anybody who asks that I’m still on mission, right?
    AAA: Right, tell them you’re just here on Guam for a few days to see Pedro’s ordination, and then you go back to the sick and suffering. If they ask where your mission, tell them its somewhere in China.
    FHC: Ooh, I’m so excited about the trips back to Guam, and back home. It’ll be fun in Guam with all the mission presbyters back for Pedro’s big day. I’ll be arriving on Wednesday with John Wadeson, Pat Cottman, and Giuseppi. We’ll just hang around Yona until Saturday. Is there anything I need to bring for our trip to Colombia, and spending money?
    AAA: No, I’ll just put everything on my credit card and the Chancery will pay the bills when they come on my next statement. Okay? Just bring your happy, and smiling self, okay?
    FHC: I will make sure my parents make all the finest arrangements for our tours and discreet entertainment. I’ll see you in a few days. Good bye. Hello? Are you still there Tony? Oh, he hung up.

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  6. Fly on the wall reporting from the bishop’s house in San Ramon Hill:
    First the players:
    AAA=Archbishop Apuron
    FHC=Presbyter Harold Colorado
    SAD=Sonny Ada
    TPA=Travel Agency
    FAT=Fr Adrian Terrible
    The setting:
    Several phone calls recently heard from the holy house of Archbishop of Guam


    Second call…
    AAA: Hello, Sonny?
    SAD: Oh, hi Tony, are you ok today?
    AAA: Yeah, the birthday bash was great. I know I was kinda mad about all the exposure it was getting on that damn Jungle, but it was really good. I just wish Adrian wouldn’t have done that feather dance on top of my table. It was grosss, ugh!!!
    SAD: He does appear to have some “issues”. Anyways, your tickets are all set as you had instructed, coach, and sitting side by side. The travel agency said the sooner you upgrade the more chance you have of sitting together all the way there and back.
    AAA: Thanks Sonny, you’re doing a fine job as my new Finance Council President. And thanks also for the envelop from you and the envelop from your family. Is business ok? There was less in the envelopes that I had expected.
    SAD: Um…no, the trust business is great. Someone will be by very soon with another envelop.
    AAA: Ok, thank you. I knew you would understand. If you want, you can just bring the make up envelop to Pigo this afternoon with today’s envelop, okay? Bye.
    SAD: Gee, thanks Tony. You are so considerate. See you in Pigo, then. Good bye. Hello? Are you still there Tony? Oh, he hung up.

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  7. Fly on the wall reporting from the bishop’s house in San Ramon Hill:
    First the players:
    AAA=Archbishop Apuron
    FHC=Presbyter Harold Colorado
    SAD=Sonny Ada
    TPA=Travel Agency
    FAT=Fr Adrian Terrible
    The setting:
    Several phone calls recently heard from the holy house of Archbishop of Guam


    Third call…
    AAA: Hello, this is His Excellency, the Most Reverend Anthony Sablan Apuron, OFM Cap DD. I’m calling to make a change to my reservation next week.
    TPA: Good morning, your eminence. How can I help you?
    AAA: It’s not your eminence yet. It is still your excellency. But I want to use my miles to upgrade my flights to Colombia. And also for Reverend Harold Colorado, who will be traveling with me on this very important trip.
    TPA: Yes your excellency. Sorry about the mistake with your title. Will that be Business class or first class?
    AAA: You idiot, do you not know by now that a person of my stature also expects to travel first class? It would be demeaning to travel with common business class people! I sure miss Fran. She always knew how to handle my travel arrangements.
    TPA: I am so sorry your excellency. I will make sure to note in your record to always upgrade to first class only. As you were yelling at me, and you had every right to do so, I was able to look at the flights and confirm First class for you and Reverend Harold Colorado, on all segments but Panama City to Medellin. But its only a 90 minute flight, so coach won’t be so bad. Is that ok?
    AAA: Hell no, that is not okay! There is no way I’m going to let people see me exit the plane in Colombia from the back of the bus with all the tourists and locals. You have a week to find me a first class seat. If it has to be on a later flight that day, so be it. Or if you can only find one seat on our flight that’s ok, too. Harold is just a priest. He can ride in coach this time. It won’t look bad because he is from Colombia. But get that segment fixed, I don’t want to have to pull out of your travel shop and have to find a new one.
    TPA: I completely understand. There is a flight that leaves 4 hours later that has one first class upgrade available, but the coach ticket is $300 more per person. Will that be okay?
    AAA: Yes. Charge my Archdiocese credit card, and book that change right away. Does Panama City have a first class lounge with a private meeting room?
    TPA: Yes they do. I’ll reserve a room for two. Is there anything else I can help you with today?
    AAA: No. But you really need to learn better customer service. I’m not just any traveling person. I am your Archbishop, and I am a lifetime elite mileage member. I expect to be treated as such whenever I call!
    TPA: I am sorry your excellency. I will make sure to do better next time. I’ll see you at Pigo this afternoon. Hello? Are you still there, your excellency? Oh, he hung up.

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  8. Fly on the wall reporting from the bishop’s house in San Ramon Hill:
    First the players:
    AAA=Archbishop Apuron
    FHC=Presbyter Harold Colorado
    SAD=Sonny Ada
    TPA=Travel Agency
    FAT=Fr Adrian Terrible
    The setting:
    Several phone calls recently heard from the holy house of Archbishop of Guam


    Final call before nap time…
    AAA: Adrian. I need to talk to you. Are you in your senses?
    FAT: Hi Tony. Yeah, I’m good. It was a great party last night. All the people really seem to love you. Except for those few freaks protesting. I gave them a piece of my mind.
    AAA: Do you even remember the dancing you did last night?
    FAT: Me dance? I am not a dancer.
    AAA: Everyone there last night could see that! You need to get some help, with your drinking and your orientation. Even Sonny boy sees that you have some “issues”. But that’s not what I am calling about. Did you notice that my friends from the other church weren’t there last night? Especially after reaching out to them, I really thought Mike would be there. I had a free ticket for him. All he had to bring was just an envelop, or something of high value.
    FAT: I did notice his absence. But, I’ve warned you about him. I really don’t think he supports all that we are trying to do. The whole Crisostomo clan is that way, they are not obedient. It disgusts me!
    AAA: Shut up you idiot! Last night you disgusted everyone. But you are right. Mike and others are not taking their vow of obedience seriously. I want you to write a letter to him for me, and tell him to come in so we can discuss why he didn’t use the free ticket I had for him, and ask if he has an envelop for me. That’s the least he could do. That might rattle his cage a little. Then call Pablo at the seminary and make sure all the brothers made it home ok last night. Some of them have the same troubles you do, and I don’t want any embarrassing news out there about them. I really worried last night. With all those cars they had to drive home in, the chances were frightening that we could have had a problem. I really think we need to look at one of those buses to move them around in. Something nice that I can ride around in. Like with a karaoke system, a bar, big comfortable chairs and a toilet. Something befitting my office and our future presbyters. Okay?
    FAT: I’m very sorry about last night. I promise, after my DeVry Canon Law Degree on a matchbook, I’ll get some help. Maybe I can go on mission somewhere? maybe Las Vegas like Harold. Anyways, I'll write a nasty letter to Pale Mike, I’ll check with Pablo on the boys, and I’ll have Dominic Kim look into the bus idea to see if our funds from last night can help to pay for a nice bus worthy of your esteemed office. By the way, my sister would like to give you an envelop today. Can she stop by your house to drop it off? Hello? Are you still there, Tony? Oh, he hung up.


    This is McFly, choking through the stench of this place, signing off from the holy one’s house on San Ramon Hill.

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    Replies
    1. I now know why I sometimes hear people say, "Holy Shit! Thank you McFly.

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    2. Buzz, buzz, buzz. You are welcome. Can someone please take over. The stench in this compound is killing me!
      McFly out, passing out!

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    3. Wow! The life of a crooked bishop is sure a busy life. I never knew it took so much time and effort to try and cover his tracks. And all these calls on his day off.

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  9. This is so typical of how the three stooges actually think. Well, the ground is starting to swell. The upheaval has begun. More and more people are sick and tired of the Chancery and of Rome's inaction. As the three wise men who came from Rome earlier this year said, we are going to have to help ourselves. And after last night, more and more people are ready willing and able.

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  10. I don't save mileage. I simply go whichever way suits my schedule. Delta , United. Who cares. Get me there! I've been here two weeks already. God, I've got to go.

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  11. The real issue here is that Harold LIED about why he is going to be off-island and can no longer assist Fr. Mario at DYA. "In mission" my ass.

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  12. maybe his mission in medellín is to act as apuron's interpreter. ha.

    do neocats not believe that lying is a sin? remember the Lord's words about the devil: "When he lies, he speaks according to his own nature, for he is a liar and the father of lies."

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  13. Oh how fun, Call Me Tony has a choice between two boy toys depending on his mood or need for the night indulgence or entertainment. Will it be the rough does-not-think-before-he-opens-his-mouth type or will it be the sweet quiet and cute type for this trip? He's got the whole world in his hands - a huge chunk of change to do as he pleases, the adulation of his neo-groupies and non-interference from the Vatican. He will never rise to the level of his kiko master, not even Pontius Pius, though. Must be a bummer for a megalomaniac to feel. All these will pass, as all things do. November month reminds us enough. Sooner than later we all shall face inevitable judgment of the Creator.

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  14. I love Harold's comment in his lie to Fr Mario. In his email he says, "As soon as Deacon Pedro gets ordained contact him, he will help you."
    Good one. That's like telling the JW at your door to come back next Saturday so we can talk more, knowing you will not be there next Saturday. Harold will be here for the ordination and will be a part of the entourage to Cocaine country. Then he will be back by the first Sunday of December as the reservation clearly shows. Pedro on the other hand, will be going to coke country and will be there for at least a month.
    Harold, you are one messed up person, and an even more messed up presbyter. But at least you show how lousy your education at RMS was. Even though they hand out Masters Degrees in BS, you can't even lie well enough not to get caught.
    Bon voyage!

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    1. Body cavity search for Harold and Tony upon their return. Courage!

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    2. Ew. Who'd want to do a body cavity search of that raggedy a$$.
      Better double up the gloves. You never know what or who has been up there.

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  15. Wasn't Deacon Pedro already ordained? I thought that was Giuseppi's role every year when he comes out in July. He ordains, then Tony puts up a mock celebration in November so he can jet set with his boys throughout November and always stop by San Fran for Thanksgiving. I hope John's walls are sound proofed!. Some years, he goes to three or four countries to visit all his boys families to show them how they now have a good master.

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  16. I love Fly on the Wall. These posts are laugh-out loud funny. Who couldn't love "DeVry Canon Law Degree." Brilliant!!!
    Eileen Benavente-Blas

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  17. 15 presbyters ordained for Guam? Who's here and who's on mission?
    On mission -
    Aurelius
    Santiago
    Bushu
    Fabio
    Harold
    Wadeson
    Luis camacho
    On semi-mission(runs home for Easter)
    Alberto
    On perpetual re-education
    Miguel
    Remaining
    Michael J
    Francesco
    Antonino
    Julius
    Kristof ( the polish dude w/ unspeakable name)
    OJ (got to keep the harem in order)

    Nine gone and six to go. Not a bad start.

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    Replies
    1. Anonymous 5:27 a.m. But if the 9 who are gone are incardinated and are still being paid archdiocesan (our) money, sadly they are not really gone...

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  18. Tim you made yourself a fool with this post. You dont have the slightest idea about anything. By the way, you better talk to a couple of those protesters, especially the lawyer. News says that she was very abusive in her former ministry. More news coming soon. For every nonsense that Tim publishes I'll give my two cents.

    -Jokers Wild

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    1. Go ahead, Adrian. Incriminate yourself all the more. LOL :)

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    2. Oh, and abusive? Think about it. 1977.

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    3. Dear Jokers Wild,

      I am not aware of another person who was at the protest on Sunday who is admitted to a State or Territorial Bar, so you must be referring to me. You may be confusing abuse with discipline and structure, as both (discipline and structure) are needed to run an organization effectively. Abuse is a serious issue. I’ll be happy to provide you with a list of the former altar servers, former CCD students, past and current Confirmation students over the age of 18, and the names of the parents/legal guardians of those who are not over the age of 18 should you want to interview them regarding your allegation. How about a list of the pastors and the Faith Formation Coordinators? Do you need the list of people I served with on councils or fellow teachers at both parishes too? Also, remember official documents and complaints require the use of a legal name; therefore, you will not be able to use Jokers Wild.

      Katoliku asta i finatai-hu.

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    4. Jokers Wild,
      My, my, my said the spider to the fly.
      Archie is a scorpion. But his sting is non-poisonous. It may hurt for a moment but we will survive. If we lose our traditional Church, we will still have our faith. Take over our Church buildings but you will never co-opt our faith. Your control is based on emotional manipulation, praying on the vulnerabilities of people who are sincerely seeking spiritual solace. The people who walk with you are duped by means of emotional intimidation. Made to confess in public to sins best left shared in the confidentially of the confessional with an ordained priest not a Neocatechumenal presbyter or faux priest inadequately formed at a seminary that has no admissions standards, does not require that seminarians have a command of the English language BEFORE being admitted, and are not required to undergo a psychological evaluation as is a standard requirement in stateside seminaries.
      Are you the one who was NOT recommended for ordination in the states but was ordained anyway on Guam? You've been trying to prove yourself ever since. How's that working out for you?
      If Luis Camacho had had a psychological evaluation, he may have seen to be an unsuitable candidate.
      Maybe you need a psychological evaluation
      as well. Hear the stress is getting to you.
      By the by, I remember 1977 and remember
      it well. It was a very good year but Archie might not agree.
      Do keep up posting in the jungle.
      Eileen Benavente-Blas

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    5. Ok ,Adian, whatever you say, Bye

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  19. This is a real serious scandal for a Priest to lie, and say that he is on mission, abandon his assigned ministry when in fact he will be a personal bodyguard for Apuron. Why cant he just be honest and tell the truth? I suppose this is the training that they are receiving in the fake RMS - to be liars. But Apuron, Pius, David and Adrian are the model and examples for these presbyters to follow. As the saying goes, good practice makes perfect, these lies will eventually lead them to become Master liars. I cannot see myself going to these priest to receive the sacrament of Penance, as they themselves being ministers of God, are not living truthful lives. I question how these people can offer the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass, especially in light of Christ's admonition; “Therefore, if you bring your gift to the altar, and there recall that your brother has anything against you, leave your gift there at the altar, go first and be reconciled with your brother, and then come and offer your gift.” Matt 5:23,24

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